By Karen Carnabucci, LCSW, TEP

Every year, I notice that people confuse Memorial Day with Veterans Day. This confusion extends not only to the general public, but also to newspaper and media reporters — and even some politicians, who tend to talk a lot about veterans on Memorial Day.

I'm noticing this confusion as I open this morning's newspaper and see a multitude of advertisements thanking veterans for their service.

Although it is always good to thank veterans for their service to their country -- and I say that as the wife of a Vietnam veteran and a daughter of a father who served honorably in the U.S. Navy -- that is not what Memorial Day is about.

By Karen Carnabucci, LCSW, TEP

It's Spring, so I had fun putting together this gift basket for the silent auction at the upcoming 2017 conference of the American Society of Group Psychotherapy and Psychodrama from May 4-7 in Clearwater, Fla.

I call this basket "Warm Up Fun," and it includes an assortment of items, including  masking tape, Tarot cards, small sand tray items, a music CD, a journal and a package of colorful plastic eggs.

Here's the protocol for creating a warm up with your group with the eggs:

By Karen Carnabucci, LCSW, TEP

I have a new name.

Not me – a new name of my website. You may have already seen it – I changed it just the other day to www.realtruekaren.com.

Many people use their first and last name as their website name, which certainly makes their site name unique. But when you have a name that’s hard to spell and hard to pronounce – for some people! – then it makes sense to look for something else. I’ve had a few other web names in the past, all good ones, but this one is better.

Real. True. Karen.

When you sign up to work with me in some way – as a coach, trainer, psychotherapist, mentor or supervisor – you get me. The real me, the actual me, the true me.

By Karen Carnabucci, LCSW, TEP

Today I would like to tell you a little story about a family of mice. It isn't a pretty story, but I promise that it will be meaningful in your own life, or in the lives of people you know.

Once upon a time, there was a group of male mice living in a science laboratory that were exposed to a beautiful aroma.

It was a pleasing aroma, a smell like a combination of cherries and almonds, that made your eyes dreamy, your body happy and your brain swoon. Then the mice, under the influence of this beautiful aroma, were traumatized with electric shocks.

These mice eventually reproduced to birth the next generation of mice. And, as it happens, this second generation of mice birthed a third generation, which I’ll call the “grandchildren mice.”

Now these grandchildren mice were living happily in the laboratory, without a care in the world, when the scientist allowed them to sniff that lovely aroma of a scent like cherries and almonds.

By Karen Carnabucci, LCSW, TEP

A man wrote to Dear Abby, the syndicated advice column, to voice his distress about his wife’s hoarding behavior.  The letter was titled Key to Wife's Hoarding May Be in Her Genes.  “Abby,” the name used by columnist Jeanne Phillips, offered her answer.

I offer my view here too – it’s so important that people know about their options!

Here's the letter:

DEAR ABBY: My wife and I and our 13-year-old son live in a nice home we have been remodeling for the last eight years. The problem is, my wife has a hard time getting rid of anything, and she constantly brings home "new projects" that take up space but never get done. At one point, we hired a professional organizer because we had reached the point of having "goat trails" as the only means of navigating our way around the house. We also have a barn that is chockablock full.

I have heard that the root cause may be due to an anomaly on a chromosome. How should I approach my wife about getting some genetic testing done? Her mom is also a professional pack rat. The clutter is taking its toll on our relationship -- we are in marriage counseling -- and on our family. We have so much stuff I can't breathe. -- SUFFOCATING IN MONTANA

By Karen Carnabucci, LCSW, TEP
 
Thinking about the past year? Here is a way to make a good end to 2016:
 
Remember all of the painful and difficult experiences that took place. Write these experiences in your journal (or on a piece of paper if you don't keep a journal) and say one by one, “I acknowledge and agree that this happened.” If you wish, light a candle to recognize all these events.
 
Notice how you feel in your body when you make this acknowledgement.