The real me: speaking up for authenticity

By Karen Carnabucci, LCSW, TEP

I have a new name.

Not me – a new name of my website. You may have already seen it – I changed it just the other day to www.realtruekaren.com.

Many people use their first and last name as their website name, which certainly makes their site name unique. But when you have a name that’s hard to spell and hard to pronounce – for some people! – then it makes sense to look for something else. I’ve had a few other web names in the past, all good ones, but this one is better.

Real. True. Karen.

When you sign up to work with me in some way – as a coach, trainer, psychotherapist, mentor or supervisor – you get me. The real me, the actual me, the true me.

You get the “me” with training and experiences and lots of trials and errors through the years. Errors and mistakes that I have made, for sure, that have been part of my life experience but happily have been converted into wisdom that I value and can share freely as part of the offerings that I have.
 
Years ago, one of my dearest teachers told me that he appreciated my silliness. Not only did he appreciate this trait, he suggested that it was actually one of my best qualities.
 
When I went to the “What?!” mode, he explained that the silliness was just as much part of my skills as my intelligence, my life experience, my perception with people, my curiosity, my degree in communications,  my training in the action methods of psychodrama and sociometry.
 
So when you work with me, there will be a lot of laughter and a good dose of silliness. That’s not to say that I am also serious and I understand that the problems and struggles that people bring to me are quite serious and important.
 
Another thing. When you work with me, I bring “me” to the space, just as you bring “you.” So we actually work together, where each of us as something to offer as we walk together to examine and resolve the what has haunted you.
 
Years ago I read the story of The Velveteen Rabbit, told in the child’s book about the cloth rabbit that yearns to be a real rabbit. It grows old and shabby and loses one of its button eyes but continues to have its dream.
 
Finally the rabbit, no longer new and shiny, discovers that it has become real. And that realness comes out of the love of another.
 
Ultimately, we all want to be real and we want to be with real people.
 
The real goal is to be as true as we can be, to ourselves and others. Am I  perfect at it? Not exactly, but that’s authentic too. I am a work in progress, and so are you.